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  PINA DE ROSA, M.C.Ht.

Crazy or Fat?

4/2/2014

10 Comments

 
Crazy or Fat?


How many times have we been faced with an either/or choice in life and neither option A) or option B) is cause for rejoice?

It seemed my two choices were crazy or fat and neither was appealing to me…There HAD to be door Number 3!



While I was recently focused on optimizing my health, I noticed that even though I increased the intensity and frequency of my workouts, and was eating healthy, I did not lose any weight in over 4 months - zero - nothing was moving!

Around that time I had entered full blown menopause at 41 (after having been been in early peri-menopause since my late 30s)  —and oh boy, that hit me out of left field - nobody warns you what happens to your body, mind and spirit when you go through menopause…

Post by Pina De Rosa.
It literally felt like the floor had been taken away from under me, I spent many weeks of not feeling like my myself -feeling cranky, traversing a very unfamiliar space, I did not want to be around people, most of the time I was thinking “I don’t care and I don’t care that I don’t care” which, if you know me, that's pretty crazy actually!! 

Here’s the self-sabotage I was able to uncover:

Having your TED talk come out is supposed to be a pretty good thing, right? Dare I say an amazing thing…an honor?

Well, it surely was, and yet, after my TED talk came out -1/3/13-, I started crashing, and next week is my full recovery - here’s what happened:

My TED is the kind of moment in life we’ve all experienced….that moment where we share a story we have never shared before, a story we are afraid to share because if we do, we think others will think less of us, and we will quite possibly die of shame… but after my initial resistance in sharing this story, I decide to do it to do it any way as my intention is to support people getting to experience even more freedom and health in their lives.

As a result of sharing that story on that world-wide stage, I surprisingly started feeling so vulnerable knowing "that the rest of the world knows that story”...I’d walk into a room and say to myself “oh good, nobody here has seen it” (which obviously makes no sense as all my social media efforts were focused on having the talk seen). Then when I’d walk into a room where a few (or all) of the people had seen it, even though I *knew* that was the intention, my body started to feel unsafe..


too visible…

..so the old self-sabotage started again!

I put on weight and started repeating my same disempowering subconscious weight-gaining negative pattern that I described in my TED. And even though I was eating healthy and exercising, 2013 was months and months of self-sabotaging behavior…

After the Summer, as part of (and with the help of) one of the electives in my women’s philanthropy goal group spearheaded by my friend Brianna (http://www.TheNewHollywood.org), I committed to regaining my body back once and for all in the space of 12 weeks - we even put money on the line, and that money went to charity.

Because we all know that to get drastically different results we have to be ready to do something drastically different (I guide my clients in that, daily), well...I did something I had never done before (because I had never seen the usefulness of it, frankly), I hired a trainer...not just any trainer, I researched the right type of trainer, an expert in the field of nutrition & fitness competitions. I started exercising differently than I had, I started losing the weight and was feeling quite satisfied with the shift: went from 29% to 21% body fat in a matter of 8 weeks. I was feeling like I was finally winning at the game of getting my body back.

Right around that time, I started seeing a naturopath to regulate my whacky menopausal hormones, chose a holistic path of bio-identical hormones (the ones that do not give you risk of blod clots, breast cancer, or stroke - a plus, if you ask me).

I noticed that I started feeling better, feeling like myself again, but for over 4 months, even as I increased the intensity and frequency of my workouts with my trainer, I did not lose any weight.

Could it possibly the bio identical hormone replacement therapy I was on? Were my two choices crazy & fit, or happy & fat…? 

I was talking about this with my friend Laura, and I said to her if my choices are Crazy or Fat, there HAS to be door Number 3!

Where is that option C)? Where else in life do we feel that it’s either A or B? Like we can have finical freedom but we have to give up time with our loved ones and work 60+hrs/week…or we can be an artist, but then we are a starving artist, or perhaps that we can’t have both spiritual and financial abundance - how about A *and* B? What’s that next step to create that?

How about turning option A) *and* option B) into option C)?

I went back to my doctor and requested more blood work (as it turns out one of my other levels was off and when we adjusted appropriately), my exercise intensity and weight loss started to match up, and I finally started to drop again, down to 16% body fat now. Oh yeah, cuz in the mean time, I did something that pushed me completely out of my comfort zone (see FB post below).

My fitness challenge ends next week week, then I go into maintenance; having been silently resigned for years due to what I shared in my TED, being now a lighter weight & a healthier shape that when I was 18 years old was unpredictable for me…my "after" pictures and my weigh-in are 10 days…and, after 25 years, getting to wear those black velvet pants now is a most grounding and fun part of Phoenix Rising journey... #blackvelvetvictorypants

What’s your option C)?

...I'd love to hear it and if you need any support with it, feel free to reach out :)

10 Comments
Soraya Lavery
4/2/2014 04:43:10 pm

OMG Pina,

Well done you. That is an amazing story. I am proud to know you and proud to pass on your story on this side of the world!
Well done. I funnily have been doing something similar. Having weighed my heaviest ever at 142 lb at Christmas (The self-sabotage you mention is far too familiar). I have now got to 131. I turn 40 in a few days and wanted to get back to myself for that. I didn't get to where I wanted (close though), but your story of taking on a personal trainer has spurred me back to doing something about it. Option C. Get assistance to keep you in check and in balance. Onwards and upwards!! :)

Reply
Beth Navarro link
4/2/2014 11:30:21 pm

Great blog! Thank you so much for sharing.

Reply
Kris Bozarth
4/3/2014 12:51:09 am

Pina, Wow, way to go. So very happy for you.

Reply
sonia
4/3/2014 03:24:53 am

Pina, ditto! can you please elaborate on,...." (as it turns out one of my other levels was off and when we adjusted appropriately) "

Reply
Leslie Morris
4/9/2014 06:12:04 am

Pina,

You have deeply touched me with your story. I have been working on getting back to me for 7 years. I feel like I am finally on my way as I am healing my thyroid and balancing my hormones with chinese herbs.
Now that my body is responding to diet and exercise as it should my goal is to be 25 pounds lighter by my birthday.

Reply
Sofi
5/17/2014 07:56:45 am

Hello can you tell me about the Chinese herbs you are taking. Can you please give me the number for your trainer Pina

Reply
Claire link
5/16/2014 08:23:25 pm

Fantastic ~ We all self-sabotage at some point in our life. The trick is to find "C". Well, done Pina De Rosa.

Reply
D'Anna
5/16/2014 11:03:19 pm

What a story Pina. I am so proud of you ...interesting how you shifted especially how your body felt unsafe and the began to take over with self-sabotage .. I still will do this with success .. And I see how my body takes over..help!

Reply
Nick Aquilino
8/5/2014 01:06:30 pm

Amazing work! Those pics are outstanding! It really does go to show that you have the power to change your life -- the ability of your mind to change your body is the most important part of the story.

Reply
Kelly O link
12/22/2020 12:55:55 pm

This was lovely to reead

Reply



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